Never in my life had I harbored the thought that such a small gadget would become my big-time love rival and hammer the last nail into the coffin of my relationship.
I fondly recall the days when the Ex was the proud owner of a small red battered Siemens phone that had obviously seen better days. Those were good days with good conversation over Saturday nights out and Sunday lunch. But when he started using rubber bands to keep its back and stomach together, I suggested he get a new one.
Little did I know that I was putting the first shovel into the relationship’s grave. He got a new shiny black Alcatel. It had a nice radio, didn't lose network and it gave him some kind of status. Two months later, he had spotted a new model and also purchased that one.
Soon he was walking with a swagger and no longer talked or listened much. Whenever I started a conversation he would put his pointer finger up and say “Sshhhh! let me finish listening to this.”
That phone quickly got a successor, then another and another other. The old models were buried in his boxers’ drawer.
The lid of the relationship’s coffin creaked open when the Nokia Lumia came on board. Nokia Lumia soon became Nokia Lumia with the Ex waxing lyrical over Nokia Lumia which was now clearly the new girlfriend that never left his side.
Nokia Lumia slept in the Ex’s bed, Nokia Lumia had new clothes (casing) every month, Nokia Lumia was wiped down every 10 or so minutes. I suspect Nokia Lumia was also coaxed to eat sometimes but she was on a diet.
The list of things Nokia Lumia could do- Youtube, podcasts, photos, recording, radio. To make matters worse, by this time, the internet was upon us. Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp, Instagram and whatever else the bad world wide web has to offer.
I was mired in serious competition.
Sadly, the phone had kicked our relationship six feet under.
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