#fraudimaidi

The neighbor’s maid has several gifts and abilities....

“Mama Lihanna (I think the name is Rihanna), tuli wano, twasuze mu nzikiza. Anti amasanyalazze gaaweddewo” (Mama Lihanna, we spent the night in the dark because the electricity got finished- direct translation). I guess what she meant to say was that they had run out of tokens.

Mama Lihanna, a single mother is usually away for a week or two at a time. She’s a sales agent for lipsticks, nail-polish and skin-lightening lotions, and travels as far as Rwanda and South Sudan sometimes. 

I’m off work on Mondays so I was in the kitchen washing up in the morning, when I heard the maid over the wall in their backyard, talking to Mama Lihanna. 

Her baby voice was at full throttle. Y’know how when girls want to be too girlish, or to appear helpless? Yes, they speak in that that high pitched little baby-girl voice. 

My ears are still sharp. I could hear the TV. It was tuned to some ki-Phillipino on Bukedde TV. But here was this girl brazenly lying to her boss that they had spent the night in the dark.

I turned off the tap and listened, my hands still in the soapy water. 

Silence. I think Mama Lihanna was promising to send her some cash through mobile money.
Then the little girl’s voice came into play again. “I-ye Mama Lihanna. Kale Mama Lihanna. Weebale nnyo Mama Lihanna. Kan’gendeyo nzifune.”Conversation closed. 

Then I heard her slippers go back into the house.

A few seconds ticked by. Suddenly the volume of the TV was raised by a number of decibels and VJ Junior was back in action. “Amugambye ‘naawe baby, tugende tulye ku laifu. Laba fala ono!’ ”
 
Somewhere behind VJ Junior, I heard Rema’s Fire Tonight” ring-tone. I guessed the maid's friend was calling because her voice suddenly returned to normal. 

“Hallo? Hooo! Munnange mukwano, agenda kuweereza ssente, era nja kulaba ku wiikendi!!!”. (My dear friend, she’s sending some money. I’ll see you on the weekend.)

You know how when you hear Mama Lihanna’s maid 'frauding' her boss?