#formeIjustkeptquiet

Not a week goes by without a report in the news about a murder, rape, fight, etc in Lwengo, Mityana and Mubende districts. They seem to have booked slots in the TV bulletins. At one point, it used to be Mukono and Luweero. One story that really caught my attention was about a father in Lwengo who defiled his 8-yr old daughter then stabbed her repeatedly (He confessed later). She didn't live to tell the tale. He hid the body in the house for days. His heinous act was only discovered when a curious neighbor passing by, smelt the stench and reported to the village chairman. (Meanwhile, the man was hiding in a ffene tree watching all the drama in his compound unfold.)
On TV, the neighbors were saying: "Yeah, that man was very strict, nga he used to cane the kid so hard!"
Another one: "He had a very bad heart! Kale, now seen what he has done."
Others were shaking their heads, as they covered their noses in disgust.
"Actually, he had started acting extra weird of late. He had even chased away his wife."
And so on and so forth myaa myaa.
But why did they turn a blind eye when they were all aware that they had a monster in their midst?? If they had alerted the authorities, the little girl would maybe, just maybe, be alive today.
That disease of "For me I just kept quiet," is so ingrained in us. Oba is it the fear to poke the leopard's nani? Is it because we are selfish? The "nfunira wa?" syndrome perhaps? Can I blame it on rural-urban migration, rural-rural migration, urban-urban migration? Are we too busy for others, or do we see this as meddling in other people's lives if we intervene?
Anyway, whatever it is, "For me I just kept quiet" now has a permanent places in many people's lives. We feed it, we clothe it and it has a well-laid bed in our houses.
Just like these mizigo women with their scrubbed slippers and clean verandahs who spend the day at home cooking supper on their small sigiris and in immaculately-scrubbed sufurias. Someone told me a story that when her maid ran off (she is a businesswoman in Jinja) with one of the builders from the next door plot, her mizigo neighbors started recounting to her how the maid was always eating her children's food, giving them karate kicks, and threatening them if they reported to their mum. So if they knew all this was happening, why did they 'just keep quiet’?
Then we have these men who bring their crass talk to the workplace - asking a pregnant woman how she got pregnant, commenting on women’s ass-ets, speaking vulgar and enjoying it. And the women smile along, even if they hate it so much. She just keeps quiet because she wants to keep the peace and be part of the band.
The taxi conductor raises the fare by 500 shillings, we all keep quiet. The taxi driver is pounding the accelerator so hard that the passengers are clinging onto their seats in terror, we all keep quiet. The vendor’s stack of tomatoes has two nearly-rotten fruits, we keep quiet and pay.
The neighbor’s maid brings men into the house when the masters are away, we keep quiet because “munnange, that is not our business.”
Someone forgot to close their zipper and is parading around the whole place like that. You look there and look away embarrassed. And just keep quiet.
Wealthy government officials receive large presidential handshakes, we yap about it for a while, and then shrug our shoulders.
Your workmate comes in with a black eye, you don't bother to ask because “her matters are her matters”, so you just keep quiet.
You hear thieves breaking into your neighbor’s house and the neighbor yelling for help, but you can’t help because that’s their business.
So you just keep quiet. And moss grows in your mouth and life goes on. Quietly.