#okusomakuno!

Dear Gavumenti,

Since everybody is singing about "Tusaba Gavumenti Etuyambe", I have also decided to add my voice, as I prepare for my future grand-kids…

Gavumenti, now that you have been in office for about three months or so, I think this is a good time to deliver this my missive. I have had countless issues with this education system for years. From homework for three-year olds, to holiday work, to these classes that start at 6am and end at 9pm, to these byeetaago aka requirements for the term.

Let me start with the most burning issue first- the HOMEWORK. The DRATTED homework. Gavumenti wamma, do you know that the teachers at my niece’s nursery school, she is only three years old- in baby class, are giving her daily homework? Not homework mbu “Go and find this out, or go and pick some stones and dried flowers that we will use in class tomorrow.” No, it is paperwork. Now Gavumenti, you imagine how this child will be by the time she is six, with all that homework, eh? She will be fed up. And yet she still has two more years of nursery school, seven years of Primary school, then six years of secondary and high school, and four long years of university, packed with coursework on all sorts of topics. Gavumenti, please rein in these our teachers who are torturing our little ones with daily homework, which many parents do not even know the answers to and are now resorting to Google to hunt.

The second safari ant in my pant is the Holiday Work. Oh! This matter has frayed my already-stressed out nerves. Let me give you the scenario, especially in boarding school. On the last day of term, there is an announcement at the gate that parents should pick reports from the class teacher. So off you go, child in tow, to see the class teacher, who is sitting in some corner of the classroom surrounded by worried-looking parents wanting to know if their hard-earned money was put to good use.
But on close inspection, you soon realize that they are not worried about the fees they forked out and whether it was really put to good use. What they are really pondering is where they will get the thousands of shillings to pay for the holiday work, which the class Sir or Madam has said "you will have to buy first before you can get your little one’s report". Yes, that is how they torture parents.
And let me tell you something else Gavumenti, the work can cost anything from 20,000 shillings, sometimes 30,000 shillings. Imagine if you have three children in the school. That is 60,000 shillings or 90,000 shillings that is not budgeted for! For holiday work whose charges change every term.
Kati wait-- something more on the holiday work. Aren't- children supposed to have a balance between work and play? You also know that they have to be happier and better adjusted as we move towards a middle-income economy.

So, they have been working the whole term, reporting to class early and leaving late, and the holiday means its time to relax and unwind. That is the meaning of the word “holiday”, unless of course the Oxford dictionary has a new definition which I don't know about. Gavumenti, let me tell you something, when I was in primary school, some few decades ago, I heard of holiday work only once- in Standard Six. And even then, my mother didn't have to buy it. So, why are these schools charging extra for it? Why? Because I have paid fees, and so the homework must be part of what I paid for. So, what are these extra charges?

Kale, now that I am done ranting about homework, there is this issue of the “requirements”, as they call them, at the beginning of term. There is this day school which my nephew used to attend. Gavumenti I tell you, that list was long. Three dozens of 96-pages exercise books, 20 HB pencils purchased from a certain store in downtown Kikuubo, colored pencils from Aristoc, three reams of foolscap paper, 18 ballpoint pens etc etc. For one term. Not for one year!! And I have not exhausted the list.

I tell you Gavumenti, when I looked at the envelope in which the report and other papers was tucked, it was fat. I first read the report, then I read the newsletter which was telling me how the term “had been”- with the sports day, and the P7 pupils who passed in First Grade and Second Grade and the trips to Murchison Falls and Tororo Rock.

I knew there was a list, but I tactfully reserved it for last because I did not want to get a heart attack at the beginning of the holiday. And then hesitantly, slowly, carefully, I pulled it out and let out a loud whoop! My nephew worriedly jumped to my side as I clutched at the piece of paper, my eyes nearly popping out of my sockets, “Mama, kiki? Obadde ki?”
“Bannange, bannange!” was all I could say in replay, shaking my head from side to side like an agama agama lizard.
The requirements on that list alone cost 560,000 shillings! By the way Gavumenti, the fees was 970,000 shillings.
And now that he is in boarding school, the school asks for four huge tubs of Vaseline jelly, five medium-sized tubes of Colgate, eight bars of Nyota soap, two kilograms of Ariel washing powder, not Safi or Nomi or this Omo which I have know all my life. Plus others.
Gavementi, kindly note that I am quoting brand names here. I have tossed and turned in my bed over these brands, night after night. Does my nephew brush his teeth after every meal-even when he has just a snack of groundnuts? Is his skin so rough that it needs to be coated with petroleum jelly all the time? And the soap. Heck, I have a whole household and we use only two bars a month!

Gavumenti, this my letter is long... I will send you the second part tomorrow...